Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
