I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
