Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize