I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Randomize