I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
