so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Semen is not good for contacts.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
