normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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