Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
