before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I want to fling myself into the sun
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
