This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
