weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
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