so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize