Got a toothbrush?
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
