I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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