No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
