I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
