Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
you're hired as official boob wrangler
and you fell through a lawn chair
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
