found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
