five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
