Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
