So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize