their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Randomize
