He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
She's the barista slut.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
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