im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
