he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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