let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
