I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
