Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
