I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
