Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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