thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
i now understand why vodka
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
