I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
