I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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