My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
