So drunk, too bad you don't want this
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
Randomize
