ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
Randomize
