i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Randomize
