Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
