I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
The power of my boobs compel you
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
