Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
