No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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