i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
