Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize