What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
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