ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize