we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
Randomize
