do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
