The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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