i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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