do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
