My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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